Who Is the FBI?
Many associate the FBI with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. In this case, the FBI is known as the Full Blooded Italians.
History
of the Band
In a remote
area of the Northeast area of the U.S. in the early '70s, there was a family
band. They started out doing your basic barber shop songs at talent shows
and the like, and it wasn't long before the band was made up of the three
brothers on guitar, keys and drums with their eldest sister on lead vocals.
The band had your typical beginnings: practicing in the garage till the late
hours of the evening and doing your occasional parties.
The father of this family band was not that all pleased with this rock-n-roll business. The mother, however, was happy to have her kids off the street. You see, the father of this family band ran a flower shop in town and it wasn't until they were two kids into the marriage that his wife learned that it wasn't the flower shop that was bringing in the bucks. To set the record straight, this guy wasn't into anything other than legitimate business practices. It's just that he never talked about it, and his wife didn't understand why he wouldn't talk about his business. Besides, she wanted to see her kids develop their talents and go into show business. I guess she took a crack at show business herself as a singer back in the '40s.
It wasn't long before the oldest sister left the band. For purposes of this story, we will refer to the three brothers by their nicknames: Italian Ice, Stig and Rocko. The band had an official name, which I don't want to reveal as it is a family name and we don't want to make any unnecessary associations, but everyone referred to them as The Full Blooded Italians. The boys hired various bass players and vocalists over the years, but the constant of the band was always the family, the three brothers.
It was about this time that the police were making regular visits to their garage; apparently the neighbors didn't appreciate the late night practices. The police, knowing whose house they were going to, didn't exactly approach the situation with grace. Stig was a loose cannon, you see, and he always making a wise-guy remark for the police, and as time went on…Stig developed an extreme hatred for the cops.
On the
Cuffs of Fame
The FBI (as the fans now called them) started picking up gigs at the local pizza joint, and the town went nuts! It wasn't long before their uncle Joey became their manager and had the guys booked solid in the tri state area. I remember it like it was yesterday-it was the early '80s, and the punk bands were in and all that. It wasn't exactly the boy's cup of tea…But, I tell you, they had attitude and there was plenty of trouble and good times along the way, mostly Stig and his cousin Lefty. You see, it was around this time that Lefty was released from a correctional institution. He had nothing going on, and he was a pretty good little bass player, so the guys brought him on as a road manager type security guy. You see, he was a tough little S.O.B. as well.
It was Miles Copeland who saw the group in Detroit. For those who don't know the name, he's the brother of Stewart Copeland, drummer from The Police; you see, back then Miles ran a small label and thought the boys had potential. He also thought it would be a kick for the FBI to go on tour with The Police. I think the Copelands' father was some kinda agent for the CIA or something like that. In January 1981 The FBI went on tour with The Police, it looked as though the boys were destined for stardom.
A
Bad Break
It was decided
that the boys would record their first album in the spring of 1981. One night
after a late-night studio session the boys decided to relax at a local bar
in New York, where they were recording at the time. Stig and Lefty were feelin'
all right that night and hustled some neighborhood locals out of a few bucks
in pool. Three hours later the locals brought back some of their thug pals
and this huge brawl broke out. Lefty got cut pretty badly, Stig's right arm
was broken and that left him unable to finish his drum tracks, and he also
suffered blows to the head that left permanent brain damage. The facts are
sketchy, but was IS known is that Uncle Joey found out who these guys were
and had them roughed up a couple of weeks later.
It is also not known why certain events took place in that time period, but the band basically dropped off the radar screen in the music business. You see, the boys all got involved in the family business; they couldn't finish the album or tour and they all needed to make a living. Let it be known that the only hits that these boys ever performed were on stage. The family that these guys work for is only involved in legitimate businesses and I don't care what the Feds say, these are good kids who haven't done nothing wrong but work hard and become successful.
Of course
the Feds have investigated the family for years, and you know the Feds-they
got their own agenda.
It is my belief that the U.S. Government doesn't want anyone to become too
successful; now, if you want to be in politics, that's different!
The
Sting
In 1993 Special
Agent Berger (AKA Agent G4) who is based in Washington, D.C., went undercover
to get close to Ice. He figured that if he could befriend Ice and get close
to him, he could bring him in on some substantial charges. Agent Berger, who
had dabbled in drums off and on, had learned that Ice was working on the side
as a house keyboard player. He also knew that Ice worked at a club that was
allegedly a front for a drug operation in Washington, D.C., in Georgetown.
It wasn't long after that Berger started working with Special Agent Dicke
(AKA Agent W9) who was also based in Washington, D.C. You see, Agent Dicke
dabbled in music as well and was recording an album of original songs. Berger
and Dicke decided they could work together to bring Ice down. Ice was invited
to work on the album with Dicke and Berger.
Berger started working at the club in D.C. as a house drummer with Ice; his brother Rocko soon joined the house band as the lead guitarist. This turned out to be the best situation that Berger and Dicke could hope for, as Rocko was on the FBI's most-wanted list as well.
Rather than go into detail about how Berger and Dicke did Ice and Rocko in, and the charges they dreamed up, I'd just say that Ice is serving time in Philadelphia and Rocko is serving time in Northern Virginia.
The
FBI Today
Fortunately,
by mandate, a result of public outcry from the original FBI fans, the Bush
administration has implemented a new policy on criminal rehabilitation for
extreme cases. I understand George W. was a big fan back in the days. Anyway,
a unique work release program has been implemented for Ice and Rocko. The
boys are back together making good music and they have brought in their cousin
lefty (aka Angelo) as the band's bassist. For the record, nobody's got nothin'
on Lefty, he's clean.
Ice and Rocko are under the watchful eye of Special Agent Berger and Special Agent Dicke at every gig. How so? Agent Berger is on drums and Agent Dicke fronts the band! Like I said, this is a unique work release program, and Berger and Dicke were instrumental in working it out with the authorities.
Where's
Stig?
If you're wondering
what happened to Stig, he took over his father's flower shop. He occasionally
shows up to jam with his brothers. Even though he has suffered permanent brain
damage, he's functioning normally.
Now when he shows up to jam with his brothers, that's a different story!